It is not in me

I sat down for lunch today and flipped open Streams in the Desert, not ironically to this:

I remember a summer in which I said, “It is the ocean I need,” and I went to the ocean; but it seemed to say, “It is not in me!”  The ocean did not do for me what I thought it would.  Then I said, “The mountains will rest me,” and I went to the mountains, and when I awoke in the morning there stood the grand mountain that I had wanted so much to see; but it said, “It is not in me!”  It did not satisfy.  Ah!  I needed the ocean of His love, and the high mountains of His truth within.  –Margaret Bottome

I wonder how many people in this world are in an active search for Truth.  And I don’t mean sitting down and listening to someone tell them about it.  I mean going out and suffering in the search for it.

I found peace on the ocean.  There was no treasure hunt conducted.  It was just raw nature. Unfiltered.  Me and Her.  I was not in competition with Her.  I was simply part of Her.

I found rest in the mountains.  I was not there to discover gold or conquer majesty.  I was just there to allow Them to pass to me Their patience and story.

I suppose it all depends on the reason one goes to these places and what they are seeking.  I don’t think there are any answers, per se.

In both those experiences, I was there at the beginning and end of it all.  Witness to the power.  I was content.  Satisfied with my non-position in it.  No more or less important than a single molecule of water in the ocean or snowflake on the mountaintop.  And at the same time, more important than it all because I had the power to witness and appreciate it.  Made the wave-particle duality make stunning sense.

It’s a different feeling being in those places alone.  They impart a sagacity that is not there when surrounded by other humans.

But, one has to go there to quietly listen.  One mustn’t go asking too many questions.

 

A Beautiful Sailboat
Fun Outdoor Quiz and Thoughts

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